Embracing Inconsistency: Learning to Let Go of Perfectionism

What is that saying? I am consistently inconsistent. I'm just kidding. I don't think that is actually a saying; I think that is just a Navya saying. Because if there is one thing I know to be true, it is that I am not a consistent person. Sometimes I work out, sometimes I don't; sometimes I eat healthy, and sometimes I don't. I have spent years wishing I was this perfectly consistent person who could magically stick to a routine. I spent years holding myself back from creating new things and learning because I thought I wouldn't be consistent, so why even try? And in the process, I deeply resented myself for it.

At the ripe old age of 31, after years of hating myself, I am learning, or should I say unlearning, how to stop hating myself for the inconsistency. Although, ironically, I don't know if this is ironic. But I think the one thing I have been able to do consistently is hate myself for it.

Now the advice you will see is that you don't have to be consistent every day, perfection isn't the goal, and you should show up the best you can today and keep working towards that goal. When I heard that advice, it hit me like a brick wall. For some odd reason, I was expecting perfection from myself when I didn't expect that from anyone else. I thought I was this special being that needed to do everything right, and if I didn't, I was dumb and stupid. What other explanation could there be? It couldn't possibly be because I am human and we all make mistakes and need a little grace.

Anyways, now at 31, I am learning to accept the imperfection that is me. I don't know if I will ever learn to love that part of me, but for now, I think we need to learn to accept.